just once,go back

2011

ive grown more in terms of how i see life? hahaha. been thru so many setbacks,so many dumb mistake and all those unhappiness it brought to me. but one for sure, ive overcome them all. well some are still pending i guess? haha.

what else can i say? cant find the right words to blog also. so yup goodbye 2011.

new year resoulution? simple, BE HAPPY.

2012

looking forward to growing up. hope life will be better. more interesting and exciting. hopefully will be meeting more new people. say nice people? hahah!

so with that HAPPY NEW YEAR :)

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finally done watching FLOWER BOY RAMYUN SHOP. definately gonna watch it for the second time or what. hahaha damn nice! super funny! not to forget all the main cast are hot! look at them!

Gonna miss all these faces!! hahaha!  oh and the 2nd guy REALLY LOOK LIKE JAY PARK! like jay younger brother O.O

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this song is so cute! the korean version is nicer haha the flow was better~ but still cute! :)

love her voice.

idk why im addicted to this kind of songs HAHHAA! but its so nice~ i dont even know what it means most of the times. LOL. its just the flow of the song love it!

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i love this song so much. the lyrics dame nice. its like giving you some comfort in a way. for me it doesnt need to be in a r/s to feel the song. its like it gives u strength during hard times. like dont cry,no matter what we need to move on we need to continue living. those kind of lyrics. so nice! GO ALI!

this was the first time i listen to Ali singing on immortals song. she got a very strong unique voice. and i love it! :DD

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been so long since i last blog. didnt even have time blogginf abt how sucky exam period was. lol well thank god its over. and yes so many screw up here and there thou i did study. whats new?

after last paper, me wyda and atikah went out to celebrate! went to seoul garden to have dinner then due to rain, end up gg to art museum (lol) then since rain didnt stop, we stop at starbucks cus couldnt get any nice spot to drink gongcha outside plaza sing HAHA. had so much fun, love all those talks we had.

step step family outing season US. hahahha. those leavy wyda eat all of em! those meats, those yummy meats i LOVE THEM ALL.

so pretty right? :)

next time we take pic will be at the zoo! yeay!! cant wait for hani and atikah to be back in singapore! iwsh i had more days to work! yesterday work was fun thou its tiring cus so many ppl! serve diff kind of ppl so fun! one was arabian lady who spent abt 800 plus bucks on a single receipt. too rich i guess. she ask me if we sell backpacks and so i showed her this ripple bag. i ask her casually if she want any sch stuff to along with and you know whats her reply? "oh this is not for his sch, its to put all his toys in" OMG seriously?? -.- another guy well cute smell very good guy came and ask me "hey do you sell lighters? or matchbox?" and my was sry no. and he went on and ask " or u have anything that can start a fire?" im like err no while give him that blur look while smiling. was controlling myself from saying we have stones thou. HAHA. kay lame. another one was from where idk, malay/indon? idk but yeah kinda persuade them to buy sgp zoo tess instead of the sgp tees. super hard lor, until the mum was like "u seee la kakak confirm stress rdy serve us uick make up ur mind kids!" and i just smile saying nola take ur time cus the actula fact is that the mum is the one that cant make the decision. -.- big time.

super cute right GD in this picture!!!

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friday was kinda hectic actually!

early in the morning, me wyda wanqi and kelicia was waiting nervously for wyda sis to call us. she help us book FT ISLAND tickets! oh did i mention, wanqi and kelicia decided to buy for me a ticket treating it as my 21st birthday present! of course i was speechless! BUT I COULDNT THANK THEM MORE! SERIOUSLY GUYS THANKS ALOT! :D and so the called came. we got B3 row 8, seat number 8 9 10 11. NICE not bad actually. YEAY!

so during lunch break, went for the career fair or something. didnt get any rays of hope at all.very sad and dissapointing. ohwell.

so after sch decided to meet with nadilah at novena to have dinner and get syafiq bdae cake! since i was early to reach novena, i went up to square 2. and there were alot alot of people. and my guess was right. confirmed some kpop band coming. this time it was TEEN TOP. well i tried waited till nadilah came and they still havent come. heck it we went to have dinner instead.

after eating went arnd i forgot what mall was that. hahhaa. went arnd some cake shop and we came across BAKERZIN. omg the shop was lovely! with all the christmas deco and stuff. and i saw this cake called 'cookies and cream cheesecake' IT LOOK SO NICEEEE! and then we saw there were lots of slice cakes so we decided to buy a few of different types instead of one big cake. bought 2 cookies and cream 1 strawberry cheesecake and 1 sumatra cake. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF IT TASTE SO GOOD! we definately coming back to have our cheesecake eaten there! hahaha

so we reach down the block abt 10pm? yeah. waited arnd and looking out. it was alrdy 10.30 so i decided to wish him to at least know where he is? haha and he replied at 10.55 so we thought he end wrk rdy. and we waited or more like hiding behind those pillars. hahhaha when every bus pass by! so i ask him if he was still working and he replied at 11.55 that he just end work and that his working place gave him 50 bucks for cab fee. like OMG LA! so we decided to wait at the staircase since he stayed at the 2nd floor. and the voiddeck got alot of indian mats uh -.-

while waiting for him, we kept thinking of how to surprise him and we decided with this cute way. since the sumatra cake was packed in one box we decided to put the cake ontop of the box and stick the 2 candles and the bdae stick as well. then we use the catalog as a bdae card! we sort of display it in the middle of the staircase! IT LOOK SUPER CUTE!! then we shall wait arnd for any taxi that stop. waited and waited it was alrdy 12.15 lol. and then we decided to walk anrd leaving the cake there. and to my horror he was walking towards to our direction and i quickly tell nad OMG SYAQIF! and both ran like nobody business!! HAHHAHA! we hide beside the staircase. and we he saw the cake before he could think of anything we shout surprised!!! OMG HE LOOK SUPER SHOCK! HIS JAW WAS WIDE OPEN FOR LIKE A MINUTE OR SO! BUT NOTHING CAME OUT!! HAHAHHAHAHAAH!!! WORTH THE WAIT MAN!

and so we sat at the voiddeck and have our mini 'party' there! looool! and the funniest part was that! nadilah dont dare use a lighter and im not good with it i hate the hotness feeling on my finger! and so we ask the bdae boy to lit the candles by himself! HAHA! and he was like "actually im not good with this either!" HAHHAHA! omg super funny! but he did lit the candles! make wishes and blew the candles! so while we we eating the cake, some of the indians mats left taking their van. they sort of blast their songs. and it was chello chello? by akon? HHAHA! and syafiq was like now get the party started! HAHHAHA!

i swear we kept laughing and laughing! he and the unknown bone there? ewww! so by 1 plus? we went home. send nadilah she took came home. pity her she got sch at 10 on sat lol. but she was like "hey if i can wait for TOP for 14 hrs why not 3 hrs for a friend?" hahhaa yeah true! :DD

we did took some pictures of the cakes and all. its in nad hp so ill upload once she send to me! :D

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this role is tougher that i thought. looks like i rlly dont know them at all. ive been too engrossed with my own life. and now seeing him opening up about his problem like this makes me cry. i just cried. and the way he said makes him so lonely.  seriously wtf am i doing? the last think i did was ALL ABT ME. i feel so sry for them for having me as a family member.

now i understand him but im sad that this problem was kept for too long and im afraid that its late to mend this. ahh im so sad like shit. what should i do? what am i supposed to do? what was expected from me?

time like this i really wish i had a father. if his here, he would have solve this problem. he would have put some sense in this boy head. he would have assured him that things gonna be alright.

i hate myself for being this weak. im so useless. cus mum doesnt seems to undertsand him at all. and i, i failed to make him feel that hey im watching over you, ive got ur back. i failed that badly.

now i freaking need solutions. i need to put myself aside and do that extra thing. but how. i dont want to hurt him instead,

i realised that our relationship is freaking bad.

and he kept saying i dont want to tell my problems cus i dont want ppl to feel sad for me or be stress for me.

its like i understand him but then i dont. urgh

AND I FREAKING NEED TO STUDY FOR BP TEST MOTHERFUCKING SHIT.

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been speaking out loud in an attempt to memo things faster! OMG so tiring can! and today seems like my concentration like at its lowest peak or something? idk. keep getting distracted. like now? im blogging like wtf? my last sentence was moa of standard heparin -.-

sucha boring life i have. lool

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looks who's blogging early in the morning -.- i think i REALLY NEED THIS I HR SLEEP. but im so smart right to think that schs at 9am even on monday. ugrh! and now im all rdy to go out when my sis was like how come we dont go sch tgt on mon when we can? then it occured to me. well whats new right.

i dont even know what to do right now. study? too sleepy im not fully awake yet. seriously damn shag. why am i so tired when its just a day of working not even 2. seriously something wrong. and dont blame it on the fact that i dont eat veggies. or maybe its true.

super cranky now. thou im still this sleepy, but in my head there's like tons of things to do.

love this song. Beige voice brings out the song. and the lyrics couldnt get any sadder. hahaha.

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